Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells?
Because A and B shells were to small.
May 2012
Chocolate and white t-shirts don’t mix.
Fuck.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
April 2012
The only thing I share my bed with is my TV, my Xbox, some dirty clothes, season 2 of The Venture Brothers, some clean clothes and a book by H. P. Lovecraft called The Lurker at the Threshold
WHO NEEDS GIRLS WHEN I HAVE SO MANY ACTIVITIES!?
*cough*
What do you get when you mix an agnostic, a dyslexic, and an insomniac?
A dude who sits up all night wondering whether there is a dog.
If video games have taught me anything...
It’s that a crowbar can solve all my problems.
The police where called to a daycare...
A three-year old was resisting a rest.
What's black and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
Jokes sound a lot funnier in my head.
But does that stop me? Nope.
Why don't oysters give to charity?
Well, because they’re shellfish.
The best thing about Saturday is napping
